Memorial website in the memory of your loved one
His legacy
From Charles' wife, Myra  

Thank you all for coming to this site and showing your love and respect for Charles and his family. He was a complex man, very cerebral, but full of love and humor and whimsy.



He showed his caring of his family in many ways and learned a resiliency from his parents that he exercised often as we faced the tragedies that befell us during our marriage. He was always there to hold on to and give support when I needed it.


 


Charles was very romantic. He would surprise me by bringing a bottle of champagne and glasses on a day trip to Mystic Seaport. He showed his love in creative ways, such as giving me a gorgeous pin the day I was married to him longer than I had been single. 


 


Charles was very honorable and steadfast to his friends, and he had many around the world who corresponded with him.


 


Charles was generous and thoughtful, sharing and supportive. We were able to complement each other and share our many interests and hobbies: comics, science fiction, traveling, going to museums and plays and movies, and favorite TV shows.


 


He had an immense reservoir of patience to teach me over and over again had to do things on the PC. He spent his last months relying on the computer and seeking out interesting and amusing stories and articles that he would share with his friends and family. The presidential election campaign gave him many opportunities to express his humor and opinions.


 


Charles was passionate about everything. He would become involved in a task and pursue it exhaustively until it was completed, whether it was an assignment for work or a contest that he wanted to enter. Even in his last few days, Charles found the energy to complete his recording of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy BBC radio show, and make copies for friends.


 


My husband was always there by my side, my companion and best friend. He taught me so much, showing his love in so many ways. He will be missed.


Charlie's Eulogy  

***
Barbara Tozzi (Charles' sister):

It is hard to think about my brother without a smile coming to my face. Even as I recall how we tortured each other as children, I know that we did not torture and tease each other with malice, but rather to build a bond that would outlast a lifetime.



Charlie has always been intelligent, witty, honest and dependable. In the words of renowned author Isaac Asimov, who was a personal friend of Myra and Charlie’s,



“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood. I’d type a little faster.”



Charlie has held this ethic throughout his life. He was very positive during his successful school years, winning academic awards and scholarships. After college, he enlisted in the army while the Viet Nam war was being fought, and he served as a Nike missle operator in South Korea. He went on to earn an MBA and CPCU while maintaining an extremely successful career in the insurance industry. At one point, when he was a vice president of one of the companies he worked for, I asked him exactly what he did for a living. He explained that he insured buildings on earthquake faults or in flood areas that no one else wanted to even begin to evaluate for insurance because of their high risk status. He did the calculations that determined the cost of an insurance policy for buildings and items that no one else would consider insuring. Although I hold the title of mathematician, Charlie was the most natural mathematician that I know. He could solve more mathematical puzzles than anyone, and loved to be challenged.



His talents went beyond business and his family. He alone knew the secret of how to make my stuffed mushrooms taste even better – by sprinkling paprika on top. He was a food conneseur and knew where to buy the very best chocolates when in Belgium or Switzerland. Our dad proudly admits that he has asked Charlie for advice since he was 8 years old. Charlie has just always known everything about everything.



Five years ago when his cancer was diagnosed, he didn’t brood. He continued to live  his life to the fullest. He enjoyed his family and in those five years traveled to Hawaii, Amsterdam, Canada, and Italy. A couple of weeks ago he said that he felt he had a miracle when he was able to achieve his life-long dream: a three week cross country car trip with Myra last summer. During these past five years, he continued to work until he began to lose his energy, and then he worked as a consultant in the profession that he loved. He transferred all of the family photos and videos onto DVD’s, making one set for Myra and one for Diana. He completed our family tree, and continued enjoying the hobbies he always loved – his family, his computer, anything technical, the sciences, science fiction, music, plays, the Sopranos.



He also became extremely knowledgeable about cancer, and practically an honorary member of the Yale New Haven hospital oncology staff. When he was first diagnosed, Charlie was told that only 5% of patients with his type of cancer would live 5 years. He decided at that time that he would be part of that 5%. No one can believe that he had been on chemo constantly for five years. His determination and enjoyment of life helped him obtain more than the maximum number of years that his doctors had originally predicted.



Bottom line, I couldn’t have asked for a better brother. My life is enriched because of him, and I know that his memory and spirit lives on in our family.


~*

To everything there is a season,
a time for every purpose under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
a time to kill and a time to heal ...
a time to weep and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance ...
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to lose and a time to seek;
a time to rend and a time to sew;
a time to keep silent and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war and a time for peace.


ecclesiastes 3:1-8


~*

Charlie’s time can be measured as only 55 years. But more importantly, it can be measured by his legacy, which is timeless. He lived every day to the fullest, enjoying his family and friends, his adventures and travels, his many hobbies and interests. He made major contributions to his profession, and he and Myra made beautiful Diana.



He never wasted time brooding over his illness. His intelligence, gentleness, wit and charm remained with him until the very end. He has enriched the lives of everyone who knew him well, and his spirit remains in our memories.


Superman  

Firstly, I would like to thank you all for contributing to this website. If you’re here, you knew my dad in some way. You all made some kind of impact on his life; were in some way a part or character in his story, and he would be so glad and appreciative that you are here today to pay your respects and say your goodbyes.

I now know just how “appreciative” my dad was of people and everything and anything that they did for him. I have learned this, learned so so much in the past couple weeks. Things I wish I’d known before, but it would have been impossible to.


 The thing is, I had always known my dad was a polite person. He ingrained it in me as a baby and kept up with it until his passing away. But the proof that it was genuine came in the past 2 weeks…


As some of you may know, I had been away for 6 months in England, on a study abroad program. When I left in December, he was looking fine. Normal. So when I came back on June 22, you can imagine the shock I had. He had come off the chemo and the affects were showing.

Everything happened so fast, but even as he lost more and more energy and concentration, no matter how much pain he battled in his final weeks, he never forgot to say his, ‘thank yous’ ‘pleases’ and ‘excuse mes’. Day after day the nurses commented on how they had never seen such a polite sick person. But it really showed him, showed his foundation, showed the core of my dad. Underneath everything, this was him. A sincerely caring, sweet human being. It was so telling of him and I’m so grateful I was there when he went.


Throughout my life, the hilarious, smart man that was my father has taught me so much. He’s taught me how to speak, walk, read, swim, drive; how to make robot turtles and hold a video camera, he always encouraged creativity, introduced me to a plethora of movies and music and foods, mathematics, sciences. He has shown me bravery, taken me around the world on adventures, shown me how to be passionate about life and feelings and everything I do. He’s taught me the importance of individuality and how important it is to constantly explore and educate yourself.


But the most important thing I learned from him was in his final days. The importance of sincerity and just being nice to people. There is so much pettiness and fakeness in the world and I’m so proud to have had a father who was an honest human being. Of course he had his flaws and we had our not-so-good times, but in many ways he truly was his idol - a superman.
 
xoDiana 7/5/05


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